1-800-525-0210 FREE + CONFIDENTIAL SUPPORT GO TO MASSLOMAP.ORG

LCLMAdmin

This author has written 205 articles

You Need Frustration: it’s the only way we change

No one wants to feel frustrated. It’s annoying, painful, and …well, frustrating. One of the common qualities that all humans have is that we are all compelled by two basic motivations; we want to avoid pain and pursue pleasure. Despite the desire to live a pain-free life, pain is necessary and helpful. One example of this is how frustration can lead to positive change. On a small scale, everything we have learned in life is due to the frustration or discomfort of not knowing something or not being able to do something we wanted to do. From our earliest days we learn to walk and talk because we get frustrated that we cannot communicate effectively to get what we want and we cannot move ourselves efficiently across the floor. So frustration is necessary.

Read more

Tips on Making the Season Brighter – Seasonal Affective Disorder

The change in the season means many different things to different people. When the season changes from autumn to winter (at least in regions where there is distinct variation between seasons), some people are excited about the holidays, winter fashion, and outdoor winter activities (think of your friendly neighborhood skiers, snowboarders, Santa impersonators). For others, the change in season is met with dread (lower amounts of energy, mood fluctuations, pessimism). While many people are negatively impacted by the colder seasons, there is a percentage of individuals who are affected to a significant degree, those who meet the criteria for Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). SAD occurs when the change of season produces depressed mood, low energy, irritability, change in sleep patterns, change in appetite, diminished concentration, and low motivation.

Read more

Holiday Success = Managing Expectations

When you ask people what the holiday season means to them, you will probably get as many answers as the people you asked. For some, the holiday season brings up memories (some good, some bad, some ugly, some they hope one day to repress) of years past that they either wish or fear could be repeated each year. It can be difficult to know what to expect and how to prepare. I find it easy to feel overwhelmed and distracted by the bombardment of messages about the holidays (you should feel happy, you should spend time with family, you should throw parties, you should buy lots of stuff, you should make resolutions, you should or shouldn’t eat lots of sweets, you should compete with your neighbor for the most electricity used to light the exterior of your dwelling, etc.). By this time in the season, I’m tempted to start dreaming of life on a deserted island.

Read more

Getting Through the Holidays – Maintaining Sobriety

The holiday season is upon us and it is a good time to review some helpful tips about avoiding pitfalls and setting yourself up for success this time of year. The trifecta, as it is often called (Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year’s), is historically a more challenging time of year for many of us. If the holiday season represents happy times with family and friends; then that’s great, enjoy. For many of us, this time of year brings with it social engagements with friends and family members that often include potentially risky, if not just uncomfortable, situations where your resolve is tested. It should come as no surprise to anyone that there is a higher likelihood of being offered, gifted, or simply being in the presence of more alcohol and substances over the holiday season. Here are some helpful tips to keep in mind as you make holiday plans. The tip that underlies all of the rest is, “Plan ahead!” As the saying goes, “an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”

Read more

What now? Getting Back to Life in the Post-Election Season

This election cycle has been one for the books, in many ways. It has been time consuming and energy depleting, to say the least. This is not new. Most presidential elections in the US have a high degree of “what if” fears associated with the potential of one candidate being elected over another. If you woke up to find that your candidate lost and your “what if” fears started to feel more like a mild myocardial infarction, just remember to breathe. It won’t feel like this forever. If you woke up feeling encouraged and validated by the election results, congratulations.

Read more

From the Device Squad: Remember Human Connection

One of our recurrent mantras at LCL is that it is important for law students and lawyers to remember and attend to their humanness, and to stay in touch with themselves apart from maintaining a professional role and public face.  Along with the need to carve out space among the call of work and the desktop computer, lawyers are of course also subject to becoming “addicted” to their smartphones. 

Read more

Which is More Important – the Therapy or the Therapist?

When we see lawyers/law students (or their family members) at LCL who we think would benefit from ongoing therapy (you can call it counseling if you prefer), we make an effort to match them with clinicians with whom we have some experience or have at least acquired relevant information.  That’s one of the reasons why coming to LCL for a referral is usually better than simply selecting one from a list.  My own approach, if I’ve gotten to know the therapist even a little, is to visualize him or her with the client in front of me, and get a sense of how that might go.  The fact is that, while some therapists are more helpful than others, none is a good match for everyone.

Read more

The Storm at Home – Divorce can be a special challenge for lawyers

Divorce is always found at the top of the list of major life changes that cause significant stress, second only to the death of a spouse. Many people going through a divorce for the first time can often be taken off-guard by the overarching impact that it has on their daily life. Divorce impacts every area of one’s personal life (social supports, activities, relationships with mutual friends), affects one’s professional functioning (takes away time and resources that you would normally be spending on client matters), and produces long lasting mental and emotional changes (can produce a sense of shame, questions about the future, and elicit hopelessness and anxiety).

Read more

Discussing politics – The quickest way to doubt everything you knew about your friends and family

In the charged political climate we find ourselves in, it is normal to be hesitant to discuss political topics in mixed company. Truth be told, this is not a new phenomenon despite it feeling new or “worse than ever” during our current election cycle. So why is it so difficult to discuss differing opinions on politics and various issues that face our country or communities? It’s often not because of the issues or beliefs that we hold. It’s the beliefs that we think the opposing party holds.

Read more

Fake It ‘Till You Make It: Good or Bad Advice?

Many bloggers, psychologists, motivational speakers, and generally knowledgeable and caring people have written about both sides of the idea of faking it until you make it. Just the other day on my twitter feed I saw a couple of tweets that both praised the technique as a way to persevere through obstacles and others that said to steer clear of it because it was inauthentic and harmful to you. So, which is it?

Read more
Back To Top